We all like Google. Honestly no major technology company generates as little fiery hatred as the plucky little search engine (if one can be plucky when valued north of $50billion). I mean Microsoft have a veritable army of people ready and willing to scream about their dominance, their often dodgy products and occasionally faulty hardware. Facebook just needs to roll out a minor design change and millions of idiots flock to protest that they want it back the old way BECAUSE I HATE CHANGE DAMMIT. And many people think Apple, and their cult like followers, are just... creepy.
Not so much anger is directed at Google though. In fact Google has just settled in to becoming part of our everyday lives. Google is how you find things on the internet. It's very good at this. No problems. In fact very little is said of the slightly shadier side of the Google Empire: the willingness to censor results in China; the slightly cavalier attitude towards user privacy; the complete mess of the Google Buzz launch; the crappy phone they failed to sell much of. But realistically this doesn't bother many of us. Certainly not me, since I used Google to find those links and am currently typing in my snazzy Google Chrome browser. Google Google Google.
Of course Google's reputation is built upon its ability to give you information as soon as possible. And today Google unveiled Google Instant which speeds the whole process right up... apparently. To be honest Google Instant is flashy but pretty much useless.
In fact it is the culmination of one of the worst trends in website design: the website assuming it knows what you want. Facebook does it hideously badly, Wikipedia is slightly better but still horrible and hides the fact that it needs a half decent search function. And now the daddy of internet search is going to be shouting suggested news stories, phrases and videos in my face without me finishing. It's like having one of those friends who continually interrupts and tries to finish your sentences.
To be perfectly clear: I am an adult, with a good level of education. I am fully capable of typing a bunch of words and hitting enter. I am perfectly fine with this.
The Google Instant introduction page proudly states that this "enhancement" can save you 2-5 seconds per search! Well thank fuck for that, I'm often 30 seconds late to important meetings after conducting six Google searches in preparation. Now that can be a thing of the past.
Honestly this development will only be of benefit to tedious lifehackers who make themselves more productive by wasting their lives measuring how fast they do things, whilst the rest of us stick with the shitty slow method because we're bored and lazy and probably overweight and that's fine because at least we don't worry about saving two seconds when trying to order from Domino's online.
And you want to know the worst thing about Google Instant? Search for porn, go on. You get nothing. Not so keen to be helpful now is it?
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